Gibson: Australian for "Gory" 

Originally Published at Vutant on 26 Feb 2004

Dunston Holloway is a frequent contributor to Fangoria magazine and operator of the soon-to-open website, Blood Hound - The Gore Movie Site. I sent him an e-mail asking if he could review some movies so I wouldn't have to come up with updates on my own. We at Vutant are proud to present his review of The Passion of the Christ.


Dude, I got to start out by telling you that i absolutely didn't want to see this film. I've had it in for the Christians, frankly, ever since they protested Silent Night, Deadly Night back in the 80's. However, I'm dating this girl now, and she was all like, "Dunston, you make me go see all of those gross movies, could you just this once go see a movie I want to see?"

I tried to explain to her that seeing gorey movies wasn't just my hobby, that it was my job, but I love her and stuff, so she prevailed and I went.

Well, gore fans, let me tell you, I loved this film.

Roger Ebert has called it the most violent film he's ever seen. I won't go that far - I think that some of the classic Japanese anime movies are much more violent than this. I will say that I am going to see this movie again and again. The scourging scene alone was, for me, an erotic highlight not soon to be surpassed on screen.

But I get ahead of myself here. The movie starts out pretty slow. I was really worried that is was going to suck, but then the subtitles came in. As all true gore fans know, subtitles are a sure sign that you are in for some pretty serious gore. Frankly, torture is always more interesting in a foreign language, as I discussed in my essay "Attacchi Una Lamierina Arrugginita Attraverso La Mia Guancica - Torment in Italian Cinema."

Anyhow, Jesus is, as the song goes, way cool. He takes more punishment than any character I've ever seen in a movie. It turns out that "passion" used to refer to phsyical suffering - if I'd known that, I would have been the first in line to see the film. Jesus seems to have an endless supply of blood, which is awesome because it means he is able to keep bleeding for the whole film.

I can't deny the fact that the crucifiction was awesome. You really hear the bones of his hand crunch as the big spikes - I would call them nails - are driven through them. That is the sort of attention to detail that most gore movies leave out. Between this and the torture scene in Braveheart, I would like to formally annoint Mel Gibson "The Wizard of Gore."

Gore fans, don't let the fact that this film is about Jesus put you off. There is almost no religious content at all. Jesus is too busy getting stabbed, scouraged and beaten to do much preaching.

However, if you like realistic torture and execution, I would be stunned if you see a better movie all year.

I give this one four chainsaws (our of four).

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