Ashcroft Hates Boobies Originally Untitled 

Reprinted from Chickenlegs - 9/13/02

I am not asking you to hate John Ashcroft for buggering the Freedom of Information Act. I'm not asking you to hate him because he may be a racist, or because he may favor Christians over non-Christians in a decidedly un-American way. I'm not even asking you to dislike him because of his singing.

Two BoobsNo, I am asking you to hate him because he doesn't like boobs.

Most of you already know that Ashcroft spent something like $8,000 to cover up the breast on the statue on the hall of the Justice League of America or whatever it is called. Sure, its old news.

Now, I also realize we are living in frightening times and that we Americans are supposed to be blindly thinking whatever our leaders tell us to think. Hey, I'm all for not thinking - It makes my brain hurt. Never-the-less, I want to stress that Ashcroft's kind of prudish views are a direct threat to our way of life.

Specifically, to our cam-community. If Ashcroft had his way, all of the women that you can visit from this page would have to wear drapes over their boobs all of the time. On cam and off. Even the ChickenlegsTM Random Boobs of the Moment would have to be covered up. Nursing babies would have to suck life giving milk through a purple sheet. Purple dye is deadly to babies, you know.

I urge you all to keep an eye on the things Ashcroft is doing. Don't worry about the fact that he is taking away your right to access government and corporate information. Ignore the fact that he is making it possible to detain American citizens without charges or trial for as long as he wants. Forget that he might think you are less of an American than he is if you don't believe in his particular form of Christianity.

Worry about the fact that he is anti-boob.

Please. For the babies.
Comments: Post a Comment

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?